Juxtaposition, Wanderlust, and the Balance In Between

There is a certain amount of wanderlust in my blood.  We moved a fair amount when I was a child, not a ton, but enough to make an impact, I think.  Since I've left home, I've lived in 8 different apartments or houses.  2 were my parents homes, 4 were apartments, 1 was a dorm, and 1 is the house I now rent by myself.  My parents generally move every 3 years or so, and that suits them well enough.

I have a deep yearning to see the world, to experience different cultures and touch the skin of others born into unique situations.  I want to see nature, especially, and the wondrous bits of it that exist beyond my backyard.

But I also have a deep yearning to nest, to build a home and a family, to be close to my parents and brother and friends.  I want to hop in the car after church and drive to see my cousin and her family, then stop by my parents for dinner.  I want to experience the gift of motherhood and share all that is love and the world with my little ones.

So that is me.  I have a longing to roam, to fly, but to always have a soft place to land, a home with beating hearts and flesh and blood that welcomes me and is there for me and holds the space that I need.  The idea of taking my little family with me everywhere appeals to me greatly, like a nomadic gypsy family, but I don't have a little family quite yet and traveling alone, while refreshing and humbling, isn't always super amazingly fun for me.

Does this sound confusing?  That's probably because I feel confused.  ;).  For now, I'm content to live my little peaceful life and make money as a night nurse while planning travels. My parents are three hours away and for that I'm grateful.  My cousin and sister-friends are always available via the phone and my brother is safely tucked away in the eastern most corner of the country, but still present in my heart.