Hey Guys and a Rant

Note: I have received several sweet, heartwarming comments but also a few negative comments about this post.  Because of this I have disabled comments.  Please remember that this is a personal lifestyle blog and if what I say offends you, you most certainly don't have to read it.  


So it snowed.  And iced.  Hopefully it melts soon. It was pretty dramatic, as I had to work the night it blew in.  What typically takes me 30 minutes took over an hour, and cars and trucks were sliding off the road left and right.  I saw a big gasoline truck slip and fish-tail out into the median right in front of me.  Luckily no one was hurt.  The hospital was understaffed because of the bad weather and they were worried that they would have to keep us over our 13 hour shifts because day shift couldn't come in.  Yeah, they can do that.  Nurses don't get enough respect or acknowledgment.  My relief was only a bit late, so it was all good for me and I was able to drive the hour home again in new, fresh ice.



Anyway, here's some snow pictures.

Holiday Gift Guide: The Men in Your Life

I think men are the hardest people to shop for in the entire world.  Like ever.  Ever.  I used to get the standard coffee cup or book or DVD, but not this year!  Nope, this year, I'm throwing down the gift-giving gauntlet and picked the most epic gifts ever.  Here's a few ideas (click the links to find where to get them):

Alarm clock that you have to shoot to make stop.  How neat is that?!

Hehe.  I know who I'm getting this for...

6 pack of Beer Soap.  What?! 

Nerdy Clock

BBQ rubs of the states.  My favorite would be Texas, of course

Make your own beer!

Whiskey Stones

Really Cool Shoes

Life Lately

The chili from Wendy's is pretty good!  I like it on my way to work. 

This is a family favorite. I can remember my dad singing this loudly all over the house at Christmas time. 

Vitamin K vial made of glass that you literally have to break open to syringe out.  Seems like a dumb idea...

Been making homemade Apple Cider Vinegar

Apple Butter. Amazing. 

Cutie patootie

My hand all swole up and red from the gel we use at work.  

My new turkey feather in my collection. :)

Do Yall Save Bacon Grease?

This man loves his bacon

The other day I had a friend over at my house and I was making breakfast for dinner.  Being a well-rounded girl that I am, I was expertly frying up some bacon*.  When I was done, I took the skillet and popped my bacon jar out of the fridge to pour the new grease in.  My friend's eyes widened.  "What are you doing?" She asked.  "Are you keeping the fat?!"  I stared at her. Of course I was.  Who doesn't keep the bacon fat?  I use it for everything!  Cooking in, flavoring beans, corn, green beans, cornbread, cooking eggs...everything!  It's especially good at caramelizing onions.  Is that weird?  Do yall keep your bacon grease?  

*avoiding the splattering grease and trying to not burn it too much.  

Bacon Grease Facts:

1. It's free

2. It's yummy

3. It has 38 calories per tablespoon, according to google

4. It is solid in the fridge and super easy to spoon out

5. It is technically recycling, which makes it green.  

Crockpot Maple Pumpkin Butter + How to Eat It

Oh man, you guys.  This stuff is good.  Like in an epic good kind way.  Like make a batch and eat it all, then make a batch to give to everyone you know.  It's creamy, thick, warm, and made from a vegetable...so it's really actually nearly healthy.  Maybe.  Nearly.  Just go make some. It's like a hug for your taste buds.

Maple Pumpkin Butter 

28 ounce can of pumpkin puree

1/4 c. apple cider

2 Tablespoons  maple syrup

1/4 cup packed brown sugar

2 teaspoons cinnamon 

1/2 teaspoon nutmeg

1 teaspoon ginger

*2 Tablespoons butter (optional)

*I add butter because I think it lends a creaminess and richness to the end result, but it's up to you!  Either way, the stuff is amazing.  

Put all of the ingredients in a slow cooker and stir.  Cover up your creation and cook on medium for 3 hours, stirring every so often.  After the pumpkin butter is to your liking, take it out and can it, using sterile jars and processing for 20 minutes or so in hot hot hot water.  This makes about five cups of finished, amazing, festive pumpkin butter.  

"But, Katie," you say, "How do you eat your pumpkin butter?" 

Well, let me tell you. 

1. On a biscuit

2. On toast

3. Mixed into my oatmeal

4. Mixed into my yogurt

5. Out of the jar.  With a spoon. 

6. Baked into bread...recipe coming soon!

7. Over a hunk of Brie cheese with fancy crackers

8. Mixed with chocolate syrup and poured over ice cream

9. Mixed with ice cream: Pumpkin Pie Shakes!

10. Out of the jar. With my fingers. 

Rose Jelly Recipe

Have you ever had rose jelly?  It's a delicate taste that makes you instantly feel fancy.  I think it tastes like the smell of apple cider and roses mixed up in a big hug.  My marmie was afraid that it would taste like eating a big spoonful of floral perfume, but, no worries!-it's Marmie approved.  I eat it on biscuits and toast.  I suspect it would make an especially fancy tart, but I haven't gotten around to trying that quiet yet.

Rose Jelly

4 cups of strong rose tea *

1 box fruit pectin

1/2 tsp butter

5 cups of sugar

1 tsp lemon juice

In a large pot, heat the rose tea on medium heat and add the pectin.  Add the butter to reduce white foam at this point.  Add lemon juice.  Bring to a rolling boil.  Once boiling, add the sugar and return to a boil for one minute, stirring the ENTIRE time. Take the pot off the stove and skim off any foam.  Pour into sterilized jars immediately and cap with the metal lids.  Process the closed jars in boiling water for 10-15 minutes, then remove from water and place on a towel.  Within the next hour or so, all the lids should "pop" down, sealing the jars.  

*FOR ROSE TEA:  I used about 4.5 cups hot water and 2 cups of dried pink rose petals.  I let it steep for over an hour and then strained out all the plant matter to equal 4 cups of infused "tea". There are commercial teas that are rose flavored, so use your noodle and decide if you want to incorporate that as well. 

Words in Pictures

You know how they say a picture is worth a thousand words? Well, I personally am most struck by pictures with words on them.  Graphic design.  Quotes.  I collect them.

Enter Pinterest.  If you don't have a pinterest, you are missing out.  It's like an amazing digital bulletin board with links and pictures and everything wonderful about the internet.

One of my very most favorite things to do on pinterest is to look at quotes/words/soul inspiration.  Here are a few from my "words" board this week:

Dear Katie

Hello readers!  From time to time, people email me questions.  I'm not entirely sure why but I love it, and I'll continue to answer them as long as people care.  Just so you know: I'm not an expert.  I am a practicing nurse who has spent five years studying herbal medicine, but medical advice is cautiously given and just suggestions.  Don't do anything I say if you don't feel comfortable and by all means, consult a doctor first!  

Q: Katie, how do you get your hair to grow so fast?  Sometimes it's short and the next post it's long!  

A: It's extensions.  I use the Luxy brand from Europe and it's an incredible frivolous thing to have but I love them.  If you're looking to grow hair fast, try some biotin and lots of protein in your diet. 

Q: Katie, I have an itchy kind of scaly rash on my cheeks.  Do you know of anything that will help it?

A: I would certainly recommend some lavender essential oil.  If you have never directly put lavender oil on your skin, dilute it first, half and half water and then build up to full strength.  It is generally thought to be safe enough to put directly on skin.  Get a good quality, organic oil. Also, calendula infused oil would help, if you aren't allergic to the daisy family.  I infuse mine in extra virgin olive oil for six weeks,  a process I outline here.   Also, I think it's important to say that it is NOT BAD to put oil on your face if it's a good quality.  What do you think cream is made of?  If it aint some kind of oil...it's chemicals.

Q: Katie, what will help pregnancy nausea?

A: Ginger tea or peppermint generally can do the trick, with normal pregnancies.  Make sure the label says it's safe for preggos to drink.   Also, eat smaller meals more frequently.  When you're pregnant, your body shunts blood from non-essential organs (the stomach) to the uterus to make up for extra needs.  This slows down digestion and blood perfusion and can make you feel nauseated.  Smaller meals are easier to handle and keep the "juices flowing". 

Q: Katie, will you do a house tour?

A: Yes, as soon as I clean it...this month, I promise. 

Q: What kind of dog is Leila?  How old is she?

A: She is a white miniature schnauzer and she is three years old.

If you have a question for me, email mkmatthew@hotmail.com and put "Dear Katie" in the subject line.  I can't wait to hear from you:)

Leila's Traumatic Outfit

I dress up my dog.

There-I said it.  I'm one of those people.  But I think she likes it.  Every time I pull out a new outfit, she runs to me all shaky-excited and waits for me to slip it on over her head.

Recently, she was wearing her jack-o-lantern outfit because it's that season and she laid down on her favorite run in the front of the living room door.  Suddenly, as I'm reading my book, I hear a terrified bark and look up to see Leila frantically running around the living room with the rug stuck to her.  She's dragging it but she was fairly certain it was chasing her.

As it turns out, the exposed velcro underneath had stuck to the rug and pulled it up with her when she tried to move.

Now she won't wear that sweater.

Trauma

How I Accidentally Solicited a Booty Call

I'm pretty sure that I'm completely clueless about giving off "signals" to the opposite sex.

Here's the story: 

My handyman is named Skeet.  I promise.  His name is Skeet.  I don't know why, I don't question it, I just call him Skeet.  (Side note: try explaining to a man you're semi-seeing why you have a man named Skeet programmed into your phone...not fun)

Skeet and I have a somewhat hairy past.  He got the wrong idea, I'm guessing, when he was recently re-doing my bathroom shower.  My bathroom is in my bedroom and at the time, I was sleeping during the days he was there.  It really wasn't a choice, I had to work those nights and 13 hour shifts as a nurse are not to be ignored.  As hard as I tried to throw on regular clothes while he was there, he did see me in various nighties and in various states of "sleepiness" while he was there.  He was very friendly and offered to rub my tired shoulders, feet, and he even gave me his personal cell number so I could reach him for emergencies.  (Just so you know, I didn't let him rub anything, but I did consider it).  

Recently it has gotten cold here.  Hard freeze cold.  Shiver cold.  Down comforter on the bed cold.  But I can't for the life of me light my pilot light in my heater.  It's impossible.  I have a college degree and the arsenal of google at my disposal and I still can't figure it out.  

So...I texted Skeet.  I basically asked if he could check my pilot light.  I guess that sounded seductive, because within ten minutes he was there, with NO tools in hand, looking wide-eyed and anticipatory. I figured he wanted to see it first, so I said, "Oh, it's in the bedroom."  Which ...IT IS!  The pilot light is TRULY in my bedroom.  We got there and I knelt down to open up the pilot light door and looked up at him expectantly.  His face, guys.  It was so surprised and confused and that made me surprised and confused and he just said, "Oh!  You really have a pilot light!  I thought you were wanting something else!" and he all but ran out the door.  

I've never been more mortified.  

Do yall like how I tried to reassure him with not one...but THREE text messages?  Ugh.  

PS: Did I mention he was wearing a shirt that said, "free mustache rides?"